Saturday, 30 October 2010

Can I Take My Leftovers Home?

& I'm not talking about food either (don't laugh yet) I'm talking about your ex boyfriends,girlfriends, and links. I'll tell you bout a personal experience of mine (its emotional because I don't usually let people know my personal life but ANYWAY...)

I remember when I was having a conversation with my ex, him and I didn't break up on bad terms (like some y'all lol) so we were still friends. Anyway, obviously from time to time we would still harmlessly flirt (it's only natural) but mostly we would buss joke. NOW, in 1 of our conversations I remember asking him "So what have you been up to" and he replied "nothing much, same old really and going to see my girl ..." I can't remember the rest of the conversation because from when I heard "girl" it was emotional (don't laugh). I remember this feeling of rage boil up inside of me and automatically feeling vex!

Now there are many reasons for this:

a) He's got a girl and I'm still single.

b) He's got a girl and I'm still single (yes I repeated it, I want you to feel me!)

c) He's got a girl and I'm still single and I know she can't TOUCH ME! yeah i was slightly hating, and I know i ain't the only person to ever think this).

d)He's got a girl and I'm still single so he's not even an "option" for my late night booty calls (he's a faithful partner as am I.)

e) He's got a girl and I'm still single and who am I gonna trouble now?

f)Do I even HAVE any boyfriend material around right now??

Now don't get me wrong I'm not saying that I wanted to get back with my ex(because I know some of you are thinking that from my reaction don't laugh). That wasn't the case at all, like my mother said "you're ex is an ex for a reason" and I truly believe that. I think my problem was that he had a girlfriend and that i DIDN'T have a boyfriend. It wasn't a competition, I wasn't in a rush to get into another relationship, and I wasn't waiting for an opportunity for us to get back together, but he was my leftovers and I wasn't quite done eating yet (you catch my drift!)

We ALL know its hard to let a good thing go, and I was over my ex but I was comfortable in knowing that he was at least THERE and I enjoyed da little flirtatious conversations we used to have. Now during that conversation I felt like Neo from the Matrix when he gets reborn (you know the part when its hard for him to take in the REALITY of the situation when Morpheus tries to educate him, don't laugh please this is a serious moment) I slyly felt like a bit of a fool, because from that moment on the mood of the conversation shifted and I found myself not having much 2say!!

I wasn't gonna lie and act like I wanted to know the details of his "new" relationship, because to be honest I didn't really care about his new girlfriend (its political) so I didn't ask him any questions when it came to her (and I KNOW I'm not the only person to have ever done this) but thanks to such things as FACEBOOK it became more n more apparent in my face about their relationship (damn you facebook lol)

It's like when you go to a restaurant and you're hungry and you eat all that you can, so you ask the waiter/ess to put it in 1 2 2 Tupperware for you so that you can enjoy it later. It's the SECURITY of knowing that if you get peckish from time to time you can draw for it and eat the rest (y'all get my drift yh I'm going DEEP)
Now once you find out that its been eaten by somebody else what are you left with? It's just you and you're empty stomach I lie? So you have to either make/order something else to eat or go hungry for the rest of the night.

This is just something I went through and I know its not only me (right??) and after my initial reaction I realised that he was actually genuinely happy with her and I was happy for him as well. Furthermore I wasn't angry as I thought I would be after a few glasses of wine (thank you Blossom Hill White Zinfandel ha ha).

So people, in general once you've broken up with a person you no longer have a say in what they choose to do with there life, if it has been established that there's no chance of you getting back together,then you have to slyly prepare yourself for this kind of conversation 1 day. I was lucky because my ex and me were good friends and we still are! Alot of us have good memories when it comes to our ex's and its difficult to think of someone else getting what you used 2 have. But the operative words are USED TO, so don't have a period over it and think its da end of the world its all a part of life I'm afraid!!

YA DIGG??

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