Monday, 7 June 2010

What's In A Name???

Everyone has a little tag/pet/nick name, I've got about a good 5-6 that people call me because 2be honest they can't be bothered 2say my full double-barreled first name (lazy bastards lol)


BUT..


My problem is nowadays when i meet a man and ask them what there name is,
WHY DO U GIVE ME YOUR NICKNAME??


That shit was cute when I was 13,14 because that was the era when every1 and their DOG wanted 2b an MC (you guys got excited round the So Solid era) or even worse they give me a "fake" or "made-up" name coz they don't like real name.


And b4 all the Africans that read this think this is aimed @ you NO because Caribbean and even white people do it as well. I would prefer if you said "my names Andre but every1 calls me blah blah blah" but don't put up some defensive and say "no1 but family knows my real name" what's that all about, I don't work for the police CALM DOWN!!


Unless you work for the MI5 or live here illegally (its alot, don't laugh) then there's no reason why you can't tell someone you're real name. Imagine if down the line, I want 2introduce you 2my family and then here comes you and I'll be like "Everyone this is Shottabox, but just call him Shotta" its NOT going to go down well (don't laugh its not funny) and don't try give me your name 2secs b4 we enter the room coz by that time I would have got so used 2ur nickname I'll eventually slip up and still call you your tag name (its emotional and embarrassing)


I've called some ppl there nickname for soooo long I don't even remember there real name, now God 4bid you get into a accident and you're ass is knocked out unconscious and the paramedic asks me your name WAT AM I SUPPOSED 2 SAY?? you better hope that you have some sort of I.D on you otherwise we're both pissed!!


I know its not your fault what your name is, some of us have some real FU*KED UP names (i hear your cry) but I'm a GROWN ASS WOMAN DAWWGG, if you don't tell me your real name, what else have you lied about?


Your age? Where your parents are from? The possibilities are endless!!


I remember once I was at a boy's house and he told his name was Dwayne, so I'm there talking to his mum bout him saying "Dwayne this, Dwayne that" you know having a friendly chat, his mum CLEAN told me "that's not his name, his name is Jeffrey" Dwayne wasn't even his middle name, do you know how much SHAME i felt?! I waited till he came bk in the room and was like "wa gwan JEFFERY, seems there's alot i don't know about you" i excused myself politely and left. (don't laugh) his mum probably thinks that this boy just scraped me off the street and made her judgements bout me kmmttt.


If you hate your name THAT MUCH get a frigging deed poll from your lawyer (some of you man know yours REAL WELL , you convicts) and change it legally.


YA DIGG??

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