Monday, 7 June 2010

Baggy Condoms, Spring Rolls & Saveloys

Lol, i know that you read the title and though WTF is Delia-Rene on about but I'm gonna explain (as usual)



Fellas & ladies, its has been researched and debated that the AVERAGE size of a penis is 5inches. This size can be argued but I think its roughly right. It is common knowledge that not every man is BLESSED, HUNG LOW, BIG BONDED (r.i.p Bernie)


It's not your fault what you were born with, some man have saveloy's and don't know how to use them and some have spring rolls and put grown ass women 2 sleep ( u ladies KNOW I AIN'T LYING!)


What IS my problem are the men that fool themselves and gwan like they don't know what is in their face (no pun intended). They chat so much SHIT coz they don't wanna only fool you they wanna big themselves up (again no pun intended) KEEP IT REAL because when it gets down to the nitty gritty and you pull out you're piece all proud, make sure that its something worth being proud of (can i get a witness?)


IF you show your piece and your woman sighs, kisses her teeth, gives you that unimpressed look,rolls her eyes, starts putting on her clothes or worse case scenario starts BRUKKING out in laughter (that's evil!) then I'm afraid its not a good look sign for you darling (I'm not even trying to take the piss either!)


BUT


like i said b4 sometimes spring rolls can PUT UR ASS 2 SLEEP and I'm talking serious snoring, mouth dribbling wetting up all the pillow kinda sleep wen u get up u all go and cook for him!!


Carrying on, I hope that the men in this group practice safe sex, coz these are some SERIOUS TIMES (I'm always using lyrics from songs get used 2it) and if you do use condom congrats but PLEASE make sure that you wear the right size. Don't get yourself into a baggy condom situation, IF there is more condom than there is penis you have a problem. IF there is enough space for another penis in the condom then you have a problem, if a female is showing you during sex that she's not impressed YOU HAVE A MAJOR PROBLEM!!


I'm just telling you this to save yourself and your partner the embarrassment and shame, and for those that DON'T use condoms, when you wake up and find your balls/clit on your bed sheets and no longer attached to you then you only have yourself to blame. If you are gonna go bare back then go to the sexual health clinic with or without your partner and get CHECKED and until you and your partner get that text saying "negative" protect yourself PLEASE!!


YA DIGG???

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